How old are you?
41
Where do you live?
Snohomish, WA
Website
What is your history with sports and athletics?
Sports have been a part of my life since I was very young. I grew up in Lincoln, Ne and some of my first and fondest memories are from the teams I played on. As I grew up I excelled in baseball while also playing football and basketball in high school. I went on to accept a scholarship to pitch at the University of Kansas and after a shoulder injury requiring 2 surgeries after my Freshman season I left KU and walked on at New Mexico State University. I was drafted as a shortstop by the Seattle Mariners in 2002 and played in the minor leagues for a handful of years.
In 2020 I completed my first IRONMAN. (I will connect the dots below) This race and crossing the finish line was the culmination of a struggle and story that was 10+ yrs in the making. It was the process of becoming an IRONMAN that has changed my life, my belief of what is possible, my relationships, my ability to keep promises to myself, sharing my authentic self and the rejuvenation of my self confidence.
What do you enjoy most about being an athlete?
The thing I enjoy most about being an athlete is that by pushing the limits of my body physically I am breaking down limiting beliefs of what I thought I was capable of. By continually pushing my body I am making space and opportunity to change what I believe I can achieve. My body is designed to do amazing things but my mind is the thing that holds it back. If I can prove to my brain that I can keep breaking through these restraints I have put in place then I can take the governor off of what I thought I was capable of in other parts of my life as well. It is all connected. I race not against anyone else but instead I race as reminder that I can keep promises to myself on a daily basis and by doing this I can do anything.
I also love that my kids see my wife and I doing hard things and that those hard things are fun and rewarding.
Have you experienced any challenges or obstacles?
During the last season of my professional baseball career (2007) I dislocated my shoulder. After the game I was in pain and a teammate offered me a pill. That pill numbed the physical and more importantly the emotional pain. And that is when opioids found me. All it took was one pill. I was struggling with how to deal with the end of my dream and putting something in the rear view mirror that had been the focus of my life. Being a baseball player was the thing I found my value/identity in. I had no idea how to process these emotions and it was not something I was prepared for. That one pill grew slowly and silently into something that I could have never imagined. I struggled in silence for a decade as my opioid abuse morphed from a couple pills a week as a coping mechanism for feelings I was ill equipped to handle into something that I couldn’t control. A series of unfortunate events that followed that initial shoulder injury (kidney stones, herniated disc in my back, etc..) would act as the catalyst for something that would come close stealing my life. Too ashamed to ask for help, too prideful to share my secret, it began destroying me from the inside. It took over my inner dialogue, my self confidence, my belief in myself and what my life could be.
Has your participation helped you overcome any major life obstacles?
The decision to do IM came at a time in my life when I was needing to prove to myself that I could be accountable to myself. It stemmed from the belief that if I could overcome opioids there was nothing I couldn’t do. So to prove this to myself I wanted to take on something that seemed impossible. For a decade I wanted to quit opioids, to make a promise to never take a pill again and I couldn’t do it. It was so important for me that this entire training process be self driven that I trained every day for 6 months with the only people in my life knowing being my wife and two young kids. I didn’t want the crutch of knowing I was letting someone else down if I had a training partner or a coach or a tri group. This endeavor was a challenge and opportunity to prove to myself that by keeping promises to myself on a daily basis I could reach my goal. The ability to keep promises to myself has become my super power. It is how I beat opioids and is what I can now hang my hat on.
What is your “why?”
Below is a post I made in a Private FB group for athletes preparing for IM Florida last year (2020). This was the first time I shared any part of my story publicly-
“All of us have a story, a why and they are all personal. And no ones “why” is more important than someone else’s. I do think it is possible for some of our “whys” to serve others. I also think that this group of highly motivated, disciplined and driven people may be the absolute last group who could gain much from my story but maybe there are others in your life who could. And that is why I will share my “why”.
Because I abused opioids for a good part of a decade until 3 yrs ago when I had the courage to own it and ask for help. When I found the strength I had been trying to muster for years. YEARS. It stemmed from a baseball related injury/surgery and over time grew into something I could not have predicted. It’s so easy to generalize, judge and think it could never be you or someone you know or a family member. I am a father of two, a husband and a professional. I hid it from every person in my life and couldn’t look myself in the mirror. Not a soul I have told had even a clue. Not even my wife. Saturday I race because after ridding myself of the shame associated with it there is absolutely nothing I cannot do. It no longer defines me or is the person I see in the mirror. I race to prove this to myself but to also let others know they are not alone. Every person has their struggles but every person has something incredible inside of them as well. I can’t wait to experience the energy, atmosphere, and community that is IRONMAN. Look forward to racing with all of you. This will be my first IRONMAN.
I am an open book. I will gladly use my experiences to help others. That is also why I am here.
This is the first time I have posted or told anyone outside of my family and a few friends about this part of my life. But this event is a culmination of so much and this community seems like the perfect place to start. Good luck all and I can’t wait for Saturday.
I will continue to share more details of my story in the hopes that someone may need to hear it. In the hopes that someone will reach out in their moment of strength. In the hopes that I can somehow make a difference and serve others.**
It’s easy in this world of social media to assume that others have it all together. We all struggle. You are not alone. Need a person? I’m your guy.”
What is your favorite gear or training equipment?
My New Balance 880 running shoes. I was never a runner and I have come to love running over the last 2 yrs. It is therapeutic. It gives me time to think. It helps me reset when life is hard. It allows me to explore new places from a different perspective. And they allow me to do it without blisters 
Do you have a favorite race or event?
IRONMAN Florida. I say this because it is really my only event. It was held in November 2020 during the pandemic and was the only full IRONMAN race in north america that year. I feel so fortunate that it took place. That I was able to be on the start line. The restrictions and guidelines due to covid meant that spectators were a fraction of a typical race and the finish line, typically a party atmosphere, was quiet and unassuming. This was the perfect atmosphere for what this race meant to me. I wanted to prove to myself that I didn’t need any outside motivation or accountability to cross that line. That all I needed was inside of me. That it had nothing to do with the energy of the crowd or the motivation from the cheers. It was me keeping a promise to myself. Mile by mile.
What’s next?
Next up is IM 70.3 Cozumel in September and then IM 140.6 St George, UT next May.
I had thought that maybe once I completed IM Florida and this story came full circle I would cross it off the list and be done. But something happens to you during the training for something like this and I realized that it wasn’t about crossing the finish line but the person I became while training to cross that line. And I like that person and the way the training makes me feel. So I guess I caught the bug.
Any fun facts about yourself?
I have been married for almost 16 yrs to an amazing woman. In those 16 yrs we have lived at 16 addresses, in 12 cities, 3 islands and 1 sail boat. We have 2 kids (6 & 4) and one dog. We are here for the adventure and to show our kids there are millions of ways to do this life and no matter which way you choose to do it, do it as your authentic self.
Do you have any advice for someone interested in getting started?
Pick a goal, make a plan, and start keeping promises to yourself on a daily basis to reach that goal. It will get you there and build your self confidence on the way.
Any other comments or stories you’d like to share?
I am honored to share my story along so many other inspiring stories. If you are struggling and just need to know that you are not alone please reach out. So many of us struggle in silence and the shame becomes overwhelming and isolating. You are not alone and there is hope.
You are golden! What a great and courageous act of disclosure. In the eyes of those of us who read your story and were moved by it…you are a warrior..a hero of the best kind. Add to that you are now an Ironman…you are the REAL DEAL.
I am training for IMAZ this November. I have some pretty determined demons 😈 in my head…powerful doubts and fears…but my journey involves pushing them away and behind me.
Your beautiful words help for sure…
Marty
Marty,
Thank you for taking the time to read and for the kind response. Best of luck with your training and enjoy every minute of the transformation. We all have demons. We also don’t love talking about them and that keeps us feeling isolated. So good on you for speaking it out loud. Took me far too long. You need anything just reach out. Thanks again.